Thursday night, my parents, little little sister and i went to dinner for my birthday. we haven't been in the same town for our birthdays for five or six years now, so we hung out together for a change. we went to urbano cafe. It's BYOB, has a small dining room leading directly into the kitchen. It's been getting some very positive word of mouth, and my mom and abby have been there a few times. The menu is not too adventurous, but all the food was really good. Abby's chicken saltimboca was tasty. I had duck breast with some parmesan polenta. I don't eat duck often at all, not for any particular reason, I generally just don't seek it out, but this was really good.
Noah and Lindsey got married Saturday night. It was capital a plus awesome. Like full frontal awesome. Chris Mayes did a great job officiating. All of his words were thoughtful and heartfelt. And very fitting for N & L. Their vows were great. Glen Farris played some songs, including a fantabulous rendition of If I Needed You. It was really, really good. The Theatre Fire played the reception. Fun. Lots.
The last two weekends have seen me at two weddings, one in California and one in Texas. In both cases, the couples have seemed so good to and for one another. And the weddings had personality and idiosyncratic touches. Noah and Lindsey especially did a great job executing their own cuisine (not food, I mean their particular brand of coupled...life art). It would have been hard not to, as they both are strong personalities anyway. But it was really special to witness an event that was unequivocally theirs. What a beautiful manifestation of themselves together.
For a brief spell about two years ago, I got in the habit of saying i was a fan of break-ups. Not that I rooted for disaster, but if two people weren't fully committed to each other, then maybe a breakup was at least recognizing the "wrongness" of the thing, however defined. I might still think that, but I feel a lot less cold-blooded than I did then. I believe in and respect dedication a lot more than I used to, and I used to respect it a lot. But somewhere I lost my perspective, ended up down in a hole, and thought some things were insurmountable. Sometimes you forget what you're fighting for. You forget the preposition.
My friend James hates scenes of infidelity in movies and television. He gets real squirmy and uncomfortable when watching something like Unfaithful. When we've talked about it, I think it's the same reaction I have when watching people endure moments of embarassing awkwardness, such as in Borat (I mean, I haven't even brought myself to watch the movie; the tv episodes were enough. I get what he's doing- I even appreciate and academically enjoy what he's doing; it just unnerves me personally). It's a visceral uncomfortableness. But somewhere along the way, I picked up an aversion to infidelity and breakups. Attitudes shift.
So maybe the two above-mentioned movies aren't the most classic of cinematic fare, but they are good modern cultural touchstones that help me think things out. Anyway, I find my heart going out more than it used to. Wait. Not "going out" like "failing". I mean going out to. To others. There's another forgotten preposition.
I am trying to remember what I'm fighting for. Like Richard Buckner says: "What will you miss when things are fine?"
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